CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE

Early the next morning, Elinor went to Marianne's room to see her. Marianne was occupied writing a long letter, crying as she wrote.

"Marianne, may I ask—?"

"No, Elinor," she replied, "you will soon know all."

Elinor saw her sister's desperate calmness and knew that this was the last time she would be writing to Willoughby.

At breakfast, Marianne sat silently in her chair, refusing to eat anything. As this was Mrs Jennings' favorite meal of the day, it lasted for quite a long time. Toward the end of breakfast, a letter was brought in for Marianne. She looked at the envelope, turned pale, and immediately left the room.

"My goodness!" said Mrs Jennings. "I have never seen a young woman so desperately in love in my life! My girls were nothing like her! I sincerely hope that he marries her soon, it is quite upsetting to see her look so ill and upset. When are they to be married?"

"And you really believe they will soon be married?" Elinor asked, quite bothered. "I thought it had been only a joke, but your question is quite serious. I do hope you will stop with these questions, as my sister has no plans to marry Mr Willoughby. You are mistaken, and you are quite unkind to declare such false reports, though you will not believe me now."

Mrs Jennings laughed, but Elinor said nothing more. She soon hurried away to see Marianne. As she opened the door, she saw Marianne sitting on the bed, crying over the letter she had just received. Elinor gently kissed her hand. Marianne then handed her the letter to read.

My Dear Madam—I have just received your letter. I do apologize if my behavior last night did upset you, though I am rather confused as to how I did upset you. I must assure you I did not intend to anger you. I do greatly respect your family, and have fond memories of the time I spent with you all. Please, however, do not believe my feelings of friendship toward your family were more. You must understand that I felt nothing more for you, as my love has been given to someone else. I have been engaged for nearly three weeks. I have, as well, enclosed your letters and your lock of hair.

Sincerely,

John Willoughby

Elinor became quite angry in reading such a disrespectful letter. He used such hurtful words to declare that he was not in love with Marianne, and was quite dishonorable in announcing his engagement. Elinor had supposed him to be a gentleman, but his letter showed that he was simply cruel and selfish.

"Oh Elinor! Happy Elinor, you cannot know how I suffer! You have no sorrow!"

"Do you call me happy, Marianne! If you knew! And can you believe me to be happy while I see you in such sadness?"

"Forgive me, forgive me!" Marianne exclaimed. "I know you feel for me, I know you have a good heart, but you must be happy. Edward loves you! What can end such love?"

"Many, many factors."

"No, he loves you, and only you. You have no pain. I have no happiness."

"What about your engagement to him, surely he would not leave you now."

"Engagement! What engagement?" cried Marianne. "There has been no engagement, we were never engaged!"

"No engagement!"

"No, you see, he has not broken a promise to me," said Marianne quietly.

"But he told you that he loved you?"

"Yes—no—he never actually said the words, but I knew he did love me."

"But you wrote to him?"

"Yes—that was not wrong, after the love we felt at Barton Park."

Elinor said no more, and quickly turned to the three other letters beside Marianne.

How surprised you will be, Willoughby, on receiving this! I am now in London, staying with Mrs Jennings. I hope you receive this letter in time to come visit tonight, as I look forward to seeing you. If you do not come tonight, I shall expect you to come tomorrow. For now, goodbye.

M. D.

Her second note, which had been written on the morning after the dance at the Middletons', was in these words:

I cannot express my disappointment in having missed you the day before yesterday. I am quite surprised that I have not yet received any answer to a note which I sent you more than a week ago. I have been expecting to hear from you, and wish to see you. Please come again as soon as possible, and explain why you have not yet come. We were last night at Lady Middleton's where there was a dance. I have been told that you were invited to the party. But is it true? You must have been ill not to come. I hope very soon to see you.

M. D.

The contents of her last note to him were these:

What am I to imagine, Willoughby, by your behavior last night? Again I demand an explanation for it. I was prepared to meet you with pleasure. I was quite disappointed in your behavior, indeed! I am ready to hear your apology. Perhaps you have been misinformed in something concerning me, which lowered me in your opinion. Tell me what it is, explain your behavior last night, and I shall forgive you. I would be quite upset to have to think of you as insincere. I am rather confused, and wish to forgive you for such impoliteness. If your feelings are not what they were in the past, please return my notes and the lock of my hair that you have.

M. D.

Reading Marianne's letters, full of joy and love, upset Elinor all the more. She could not understand Willoughby's reasons for treating Marianne with such cold-hearted disrespect.

"Oh Elinor! I know he was in love with me, as I was with him! He begged me for that lock of hair. I know he loved me, but I do not blame him. The world has cheated us. I know he would not have hurt me; I know his heart too well. Who is this woman that he speaks of? He never spoke of her before. He only spoke of me. We were in love, I know we were!" After a pause, she continued, "Elinor, I must go home. I must go and comfort Mama. Can we leave tomorrow?" "Tomorrow, Marianne!"

"Yes, I cannot bear to stay here any longer. I came only to see Willoughby, and now who cares for me?"

"It would be impossible to go tomorrow. Mrs Jennings would be greatly upset if we left tomorrow."

"Well, then, another day or two perhaps, but I cannot stay here long. I cannot bear the questions and remarks of all these people. The pity of such a woman as Lady Middleton! Oh, what would she say to that!"

(end of section)